My Flesh Wants To Leave Me

My stomach keeps finding new reasons to sink

And spread that feeling through my veins in pure fury.

I watch people too closely, forgetting to blink.

Often I wish I could gift my own body a new me.

But that is a hope I can kill like the others.

I forget who I am and how to breathe solid air.

My mind runs on visions about sisters and brothers,

But my body does not have a new heartbeat to spare.

I feel sorry, but I think that does not matter

Because even the strongest lose the will to forgive.

My flesh wants to leave me bruised and battered.

It is too tired to survive,

It just wants to live.

-Jackie