These Northern Winds

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The strong winds push me closer to the ground as I start ascending.

My left cheek is cut open by the sharp cliffs, yet my neck is not bending.

“Is this all you can do, is this all the wrath that you can unleash?”

The winds used to wrap me up, now they choke on their own leash.

And they swore I could climb these hills with the right inspirations,

They second guessed my every argument, called it childish hesitation.

As I am putting one foot in front of the other, I feel it in my bones –

These Northern winds only loved me when I was scared and alone.

They are out of rat runs to hide in, they must pin me to the ground,

The coldness of their breath hunts me down like a wild hound,

And the honed breezes try to knock me over at each turn I take.

I am weak, but I cannot wait for them to burn me at the stake.

The rugged path ahead puts my bruised limbs on autopilot,

My feet rush through the stiff branches as the rain becomes violent.

And my boots sink into the muddy surface, yet I pick up the pace.

As soon as I reach the summit, the sky clears, but it cannot save face.

-JW

Matches

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We are not supposed to run towards the fire,

We are not meant to burn things we admire.

Yet, we step over instincts like cigarette butts,

All for some new taste to disrupt our ruts.

And I was the first fire you could not put out,

You would have used fists if that was allowed.

My voice raised alarms and broke some fences,

Two days later you ran out of defenses.

You hated my guts, yet you could not leave.

Some would even mistake the pressure for gleam.

The magnetic field never let you off the hook,

Your instincts got burned, you went off book.

I burned you alive as the crowd was watching,

Still, you gave me all your spare matches.

-JW

Crystal Clear

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I see it crystal clear now, I am just a steppingstone for your ambition.

It hurts to know you only smile when I hand you my hard-earned ammunition.

When you fire away at them, you use me as your bulletproof glass,

Then leave me alone when I stumble home, wounded and lacking your class.

You spill your drinks on my pastel dresses and laugh whenever I protest.

I wonder what would happen if I became the antagonist and make you confess.

Still, my disgrace precedes me, all because of your unapologetic tongue.

And I am not sure if I care anymore, you ruined me when I was way too young.

Their cheap talk runs by my ears like a river you wanted to drown me in.

They all know you do not love me, yet they all know I am your favorite sin.

I see it crystal clear now, you want to smother me in the cheapest of deceits.

It must hurt to know that it is you, not me heading towards the great defeat.

-JW

Godlike

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All your long overdue confessions,

Spill them on fools seeking perfection.

Wear your chasuble and say a prayer,

But do not follow me down, betrayer.

All these glorious monologues to god,

Save them for the fools who just nod.

I do not walk beyond the ordinary,

Rewrite my biography as a mortuary.

-JW

Exiled

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I was the shark you always feared to swim into,

But your open arms made me feel like you were not afraid.

And the time passed by like a catchy melody until you realized,

Until all my past sins came out of the shade.

I admit it, my teeth rip apart bloated egos for pleasure,

But your bubble seemed sinless, so I steered clear of you.

There was something in your eyes that made me cautious,

And then came the day you painted me blue.

I know, they still recite my words like a famous poem.

But you did not expect it, no, you have lived in silence too long.

Now the distance you keep makes my grin cheerful,

You know you have done one too many wrongs.

I hear them talking, and the story disgusts you,

But it is too late to change that narrative for the crowd.

And your actions might have been foolish or misguided,

Still, they grow louder and louder whenever you turn around.

I was the shark you never expected to take you down,

You cut me to size like someone with a naivety of a child.

And your radar did not pick up a sound as I approached

Until your kingdom was gone, and you were exiled.

-JW

Recipe For Failure

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They take me in pinches, then throw me overboard.

They waste me like something they cannot afford.

The salt in my saliva gets mixed with their tears.

It’s the recipe for failure, it’s a hurricane of fears.

They spread my thoughts on their walls like paint,

Then use my eyeballs as lamps, classy and quaint.

The sour sentences I spew get collected in bowls,

And they use my brain to fill rifts and holes.

They scrub my consciousness with their dirty paws,

They wrap my skull in some yellowish gauze.

The bitterness is quickly climbing up my throat,

But the anchor in my chest is keeping me afloat.

So, they massage me into their scalps with vigor.

They watch me collapse in front of their triggers.

The last of my trust decays until nothing is left.

It’s a recipe for failure, it’s a rope around my neck.

-JW

I Don’t Deserve This Power

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I wish it was easier to put down the weight,

I wish I could release all this power and flee.

But my mind reshuffles the thoughts I hate,

Hoping I can never end this killing spree.

My lips shoot arrows, eyes – lightning bolts.

The crimson clouds destroy gilded palaces.

I could build a house from the grudges I hold,

Fill all cups with my counterfeit promises.

So, I carry the stones in my pockets,

Snarling angrily at everyone who flies above.

My stares become dull, wounding both eye sockets,

They throw frozen tears at the whitest doves.

I wish it was harder to tear others down,

I wish I could stop bleeding on every passer-by.

Yet, my thoughts buzz around, forming a crown,

And I continue this crusade without an alibi.

-JW

Sweeter Than Revenge

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The darkest nights fill me up like a seven-course meal.

Everything from past regrets to clouds colored in teal,

From the faintest stars to anger that runs through blood,

It all flows into my irises as I spew darkness like flood.

And the others warned me about the muddy shadows,

But I have learned to live in the shade and opaque lows.

The moon touches my skin with its rays like tentacles,

Burning away my flesh until my form becomes skeletal.

I try to drown out the writings on the wall you left,

They stain my shell, then leave me plain and wrecked.

The part of me that trusted creatures of the day is gone,

Now I am swimming up the hill, ready to kill and spawn.

And the darkest nights make me hungrier than ever.

Run while you can, this will not be a friendly endeavor.

I come with the darkness, but do not leave in the dawn.

This is sweeter than revenge, watching your traitors crawl.

-JW

Some Sea Foam And Venus

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They are circling me like ravenous vultures,

They only see me as their prey.

It is deep-rooted in this culture,

Never admit it, never do as you say.

The smell of my most recent flesh wound

Makes their feathers shuffle weakly.

My blades are broken, they are all off tune.

Still, I sharpen them weekly.

I live on revenge and broken innocence,

The last two things I fully own.

The wolves stole my dreams of a picket fence,

Now all my hate is homegrown.

As they circle and come even closer,

I sigh as my left lung collapses.

They laugh, threatening me with closure,

But I reach for ellipsis.

I know their help is the greatest faux aid,

A betrayal to my trauma and pain.

One day their claws and teeth will fade,

But by then ice water will run in my veins.

They are circling me like chuckling hyenas,

They see me as the final act.

It all started with some sea foam and Venus,

There is no way to break this pact.

-JW

Empty White Room

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Their slimy palms slide down your back like a threat,

One more uncomfortable laugh and they are all set.

They assume you will not give them any problems,

You will not speak up or dare to bother.

The power play is never a game you can triumph in –

The house always wins, love, the house always wins.

And I hear your pain, I see you snarl at strangers,

But the culprits will never pay if you put yourself in danger.

They will not get it because they see a leveled field,

The delusion tells them it is you who holds the shield.

“I am not making excuses, but you did not say “no”.”

Or even better:

“Who is this?” when they answer the phone.

And they assume you will tolerate what you are given

Because only god can make them sinners.

But I swear there is power in feeling hopeless,

There is more wisdom and strength in being faithless

Than in any of those who are stealing your power away.

You will see that day, you will reach that day.

I have met plenty of people who shoot to kill

Only to end up being bent to my will.

Let them assume the best, let them assume.

Watch as they lose their mind in an empty white room.

-JW