Category: Bez tēmas

I wonder if they’ll bury me below the very same oak trees I grew up under,

I wonder if they’ll see my mischievous eyes in the shadows,

Sparkling in burnt umber,

Screaming in pain like haunted gallows.

I haven’t known a home in years, but who can blame me?

All those voices try to hush my words,

Try to soften the sharp edges and finally tame me,

Just like an animal in the cage,

But they cannot really make me.

Still, I wonder if they’ll burn me alive or just suffocate me in my sleep.

I wonder if they’ll ever see the humanity in my face

Or how when they harm me, my eyes turn deep.

I lower my lashes and beg for space,

For a moment of rest in this tender ground,

But they laugh as they bury my bones,

And my last hope twitches at the sound

Until it is finally quiet, and I am all alone.

-Jackie

The voice in my head tells me a dozen dramatic stories about famous downfalls,

And I feel like I am standing on the edge as I am not picking up your calls.

The papers are going to say that I risked it all just to gain some independence,

And sharp tongues are going to ironize about my failed ascendance.

No, I do not have it in my heart to listen as they protect my abuser.

My shoulders have been too strong for years, I will not accept their amusement.

Still, every time he calls a piece of my mind feels like I am making it complicated,

A piece of my consciousness tells me that all my stories were fabricated.

Every second I wait, the edge comes closer, and the dark abyss becomes bigger,

And even though I know that I am saving myself, I still feel like a sinner.

I even consider just falling down and letting them walk over my reputation.

They would eat it up like the sweetest dessert, laughing at my humiliation.

The phone keeps ringing, and my skull keeps fighting the urge to continue the loop,

And my every cell remembers how you stole my joy, how you stole my youth.

The voice in my head tells me a hundred stories about people who never made it out…

I lie in my bed and stare at the ceiling until peace dissolves the dark clouds.

-Jackie