My kitchen floor has given up on drying my tears,
And the neighbors are shouting at me,
But I do not hear it through the layers.
He tore a hole in me, but nobody else could hear.
Lessons came in different forms,
And one of them was a prayer.
The saints taught me about guilt and forgiveness,
Yet I could not shake the feeling
And could not forget the hurt.
The wise men locked me out of their business.
They broke my iron keys,
So I built myself a new church.
-Jackie
In my side of town nights get longer and longer.
They expand until all proof of sunlight is gone.
Lost souls watch from the nosebleeds and corners,
And the flowers are starting to look pretty gaunt.
In my side of town stories fall on their faces.
Cynics drown them as critics set them ablaze.
People hand me pens that don’t leave a trace
And greedy hands fill our skulls with gray haze.
-Jackie
My phone autoreplies to your messages with “fine”,
But you don’t even notice.
You assume I’m here for your entertainment,
And behind my back you call me a novice.
Your superiority, it crushes my lungs,
But I don’t even flinch, I don’t make a sound.
Treating me like an option must feel thrilling.
You didn’t notice when you dropped me on the ground.
Nothing broke, but it hurt for seven days.
The wind begs me to shatter your pride,
Yet I know my attempts will feed it even more,
Therefore, I make my intentions hide.
My skin twitches when you slide your palm across it,
But you don’t even care.
Turns out I ran away from the hungriest wolf,
Still, I ended up befriending a bear.
-Jackie
The sickness I feel when I see my own reflection haunts me.
Some days I check if the mirror isn’t shattered,
But it seems like even the shards don’t want me.
Devastation is a simple poison –
It only kicks those already on the ground.
Each time I stand up with broken ribs there is nobody around.
Still, I’m no martyr, so hold your pity applause.
The storms keep finding new ways to shake me.
I get no breathing space, no break, no pause.
But the sickness, it sticks with me like a faithful dog,
Not letting me forget the past slip ups,
Not allowing me to know what I did wrong.
-Jackie
There is this fury I hide under pleasantries and visors,
It carries shipwrecks to its cave and eats the survivors.
The flame in its eyes burns with a charcoal black flame,
And no soul in this city can know its middle name.
The things it smashes and crumbles turn into ashes.
The grey particles stick to my trembling lashes.
Do not say the name, do not give it back the power.
All my fury knows is how to slay and devour.
-Jackie
Tables turn and fall down like leaves in the fall.
My knees beg me to crumble,
They beg me to crawl.
I light six black candles and let the wax melt.
I wonder whether love is built
And not really felt.
The horizon buries its mysteries too softly.
They find a way out,
Find new ways to mock me.
Nights turn on their faces and call it a day.
I still have enough spite,
I can make it through May.
-Jackie
You slipped the words in my pocket as the door was closing,
And I knew that the weight might pulverize my knees.
You tripped me up, then painted indigo thoughts rosy,
And a chuckle spread across the city like a disease.
I took the words and dripped velvet thoughts around them,
Knowing all too well that tomorrow they might be gone.
Even if it is true, even if I bleed out like a fountain,
I still get to cuddle your confession until the dawn.
-Jackie
I dream about boats crossing stormy oceans
Filled with lust driven poets seeking their deaths.
I reach for the salty breezes like a child,
And there is no one to stop these future regrets.
Waves crush over heads and crush our bones.
I worry that this story will end in a scene.
Barrells float in the air like spellbound birds
As the sky vomits colors, purple and green.
-Jackie
Why does falling in love feel like photographing ghosts?
Why does it feel like chasing after translucent clues?
I have no proof, just a sad demeanor and joyless toasts.
Maybe the pain will go if I turn on the local news.
Why does the iridescent sheen in my eyes drip water?
I could write a hundred endings, but I crave just one.
My skull will let me fall, yet it will not let me barter.
I can make my excuses,
The fate has already won.
-Jackie
Paramours could not sweep me off my feet.
I was too busy chasing empty love.
Too busy to see what was hidden underneath,
Too proud to admit what I didn’t know.
Nothing has changed, I still stand tall,
And my heels are agents of disarray.
My loneliness burns down churches and malls,
Leaving devotees there to sulk and pray.
-Jackie
The Daily Writing of Jackie Wright 